Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Editor’s note: I’m somewhere off exploring Croatia right now, but I wrote this prior to leaving and had to share it with you.

Average Read Time: 3 Minutes

Do you ever have little tasks that might take you hours, but you know others could do them in minutes?

If something isn’t your specialty, you shouldn’t expect to be much good at it. Graphic design and complex web coding are perfect examples of this for me.

Well I have found an awesome answer to this problem and I’ve got to share it with you.

Outsource your life $5 at a time.

Recently I read a blog post on Escape the 9 to 5 that interviewed the founder of Fiverr.com. Within minutes I was hooked and I’d become massively more productive!

The site is simply a marketplace for people selling their services for $5 each. One fixed rate for everything-both online and offline/in-person work. The service is brilliant and incredibly useful for entrepreneurs or anyone looking to spend their time only doing the things they’re good at (which is the only way I recommend anyone spends time).

You might say, ‘how could someone offer a useful service for only five bucks?’ Well I assure you they can. At at over 75,000 active listings, I’d say they’re onto something. They cover everything from increasing your Twitter following to singing happy birthday to your buddy in Turkish. It’s all there.

Only spend time on what you’re good at. Outsource the rest.

My first experience was unreal and the timing could not have been better. I was just about to start the design work for the cover of my new eBook which I was offering as part of my new site redesign and launch. I had it all written and all I needed was a sharp looking cover. I figured, how hard could this be?

I opened photoshop and proceeded to tumble face first into a 2-hour time warp, with nothing to show once I reached the other side. Even if I spent 8 hours on the task, there was no way it was going to look nearly presentable enough for my site. I am just not a Photoshop guy.

I needed help, but the problem was I needed it done in 3 days or less (I’ve noticed designers tend to hate tight time lines).

I hopped on Fiverr and found someone in minutes. I made a $5 payment via PayPal (you pay in advance but the money isn’t released to the provider until final project is delivered) and two minutes later he wrote me asking for the appropirate files. I sent them and went back to work.

No more than 5 minutes later I had an email saying my project was ready. I logged in and there it was. A sharply designed, 3D eBook cover. Are you kidding? That’s time leverage at its best.

After two renditions it was perfect and within 9 hours the project was complete (I assigned it at 10:30 pm and it was done by morning). They even designed it based on the design of my website. For proof, check out the final version of my eBook cover, The Best of Reading For Your Success.

Your time is worth more than you think. Spend it wisely.

Many bloggers and E-entrepreneurs often produce eBooks and other graphic materials so I hope this alone saves you a bundle of time (and money). I was about to outsource the task for $50 to a woman in the Ukraine, which I would have been more than happy to pay prior to Fiverr.

The site is brilliant: Finding people who are super efficient with a particular task and linking them up with people who are terribly inefficient at the same task and are willing to pay a few bucks to have it done. If we all spent our time this way, the world would be an unbelievable place.

Imagine if the next time you needed a quick website header, logo, widget, snippet of code or site troubleshooting, that you could have it done for five bucks and with little wasted time. It’s perfect for the guy who wears a ton of hats or someone just looking to have some fun.

Now I have three other people working little design tweaks and coding things for my site. I love it. And outsourcing always feels so good! It actually makes me sleep better at night.

Some of the other services being offered right now:

• Advertise your site to 5,000 facebook friends
• Write and record a song for you
• Turn a picture of you into a cartoon
• Post blog comments
• Create a custom Twitter background
• Code in any language for an hour
• Beautiful woman do an HD video promoting your brand
• Same beautiful woman be in a relationship with you on Facebook for a week
• Design a logo or website header
• This list seriously goes on as long as your imagination can handle…

Invest $5 to save your most precious resource: Time

I don’t care if you have a huge pile of tasks or nothing at all on your plate to outsource. Check out this site and spend $10-20. Consider it an investment in learning how to manage the world’s most scarce resource.

I know you’ll find plenty of value. Pick something work related or just do it for fun. But do something. It’s worth the experiment.

Our time can never be recovered so why not spend it the best way you know how?

Happy outsourcing and let me know what you get done. Share your best outsourcing experiences in the comments below.

Note: I am not getting paid a dime to promote this service. I just think it’s awesomely useful.

If you liked this article, please Tweet about it or tell your friends on Facebook using the links below. I’d appreciate it.

If you really want to get serious about outsourcing, check out the article I wrote for Elance a few weeks ago:

12 Tips for Outsourcing Your Business to the Next Level in Today’s Economy

Photo 1 courtesy of foxspain

Click here to Download your FREE eBook "The Best of Reading For Your Success"

“Most of us choose to live like monks anyway, rooting ourselves to a home or a career and using the future as a kind of phony ritual that justifies the present.”

-Rolf Potts, Author of Vagabonding

Written by: Scott Dinsmore

If you’re visiting from my recent guest post on Zen Habits, welcome to Reading For Your Success! This site is dedicated to living life on your terms. I constantly read, learn and experiment. Then I share it all with my readers in the form of personal development articles and actions for finding your own path to success and freedom.

I would love for you to join me in the adventure. You can click here to subscribe to email or RSS updates. When you sign up, you’ll get a free copy of my eBook, The Best of Reading For Your Success.

Check out the bottom of this post (and the top 10 list in the right column) for a breakdown of some of my most useful articles.

Thanks for reading.

******

Today I want to talk about adventure. In 3 days I’ll be marrying my college sweetheart of 8 years and then venturing off on a honeymoon to Croatia. Any excuse to get out of the country is a good one, but they don’t get better than this. The next few days and weeks are going to be breathtaking.

There is something about travel that opens one’s mind in a way unlike any other. Simply being out of our typical environment strips us of the standards and expectations set around our daily lives. The ones we’ve molded ourselves to without even knowing it. Maybe it’s the way we expect people to talk or how they dress or the jobs they do. To some extent we become our surroundings, for better or for worse.

The best way to break the pattern of mindlessly following the routine of everyday life is to take a drastic leap out of it.

Travel is just that. Ideally in a foreign country. I spent a summer in London at LSE and a total of a year and a half living in Sevilla, Spain running a small business and soaking in every ounce of culture, language and life lessons I could.

The experience continues to mark the biggest turning point in my world outlook.

That’s when I first stated to realize that life did not have to be lived the way I was used to everyone living it. The people in Sevilla could not have had more different lives than those in San Francisco, yet they seemed to love their moments more than I’d ever seen.

That was my first experience on the road less traveled. I haven’t looked back since.

Why You Need to Get Out of the Country. 8 Ways it Will Change You.

1. Shift your focus. Daily details disappear in the midst of seeing a new world. None of your little tasks or emails matter where you’re going. Get used to seeing the big picture and it will stay with you upon your return.

2. Take time with yourself. How often do you really get to be alone from day to day? Time with ourselves (or those we enjoy) is when we get to learn the deep things in life. What makes us happy? What’s our purpose? It’s not until we drown out the noise that we get a chance to really start finding our own path.

4. Don’t get anything done. Society trains us that accomplishment is about how much you get done in a day. This thinking has to stop or it will run you to the grave. It’s ok to just be. You’re only task on an adventure is to not do anything at all. Simply explore. That’s nearly impossible to manufacture at home.

5. Learn you don’t have the answers. It’s easy to think you have life figured out when you do the same things every day. As soon as this thinking takes over, it’s time to step back and reflect. Get out and find some new questions. Often people expect to go out and find all the answers, but after a long trip you might have nothing but more questions. Awesome.

6. Make time for the big ideas. Free your mind. You have to escape the confines of your routine to really let your mind free. The further from your usual reality the better. Think big and capture the ideas somewhere (notebook, mindmap, or scribbles on post cards). You won’t even have to try. New experiences trigger the imagination better than anything.

7. There’s no comparison. Comparison drains energy. It’s likely affecting you whether you know it or not. In another country, culture, language or society, nothing is comparable. You won’t be jealous of someone’s job or how they look or live, because it’s all apples to oranges. You get to put down your guard and simply enjoy the new interactions. The focus shifts from judging to learning. The only comparison you’ll likely experience is how much simpler, yet enjoyable others’ lives are. That can be the most eye-opening of all.

8. Realize you don’t matter that much. Immersing yourself in another culture deepens your perspective like nothing else. You quickly realize what you’re doing in your bubble is really not that major in the scheme of things. Allow this to take the pressure off yourself and stop taking so many simple wonders for granted. I spent a few weeks in Africa a while back, and wow, that’s how you’ll start to appreciate the small things. A pair of socks, your own bathroom or simply fresh water. Stress becomes a little harder to find in that light.

New experiences mean new tools. We learn something from every one. Start having them today. Whether it’s expanding our taste buds on some fresh local eats, or expanding our mind with renting a Smart Car with zero understanding of the native tongue.

One ‘aha’ for me was noticing the small Spanish restauranteur who was a terrible advertiser, until I realized it wasn’t because he didn’t know how, but because he didn’t want or need any more customers. He was just keeping it simple. That thinking isn’t too common where I’m from.

Don’t worry about finding the experiences. Just get yourself into a foreign land and they will find you.

Find Yourself by Losing Yourself

The people who haven’t traveled don’t think they’re missing much, and those who have, don’t know how they could live without it.

If you haven’t been outside of your environment lately (or ever), make it a priority. Make it a must.

Telling yourself you don’t have enough time or enough money are not valid excuses, they are just statements of priority. If you get creative, you can travel like a king for less than your monthly rent. Tim Ferriss of The 4-Hour Work Week and Rolf Potts of Vagabonding teach (and prove) this better than anyone.

There are ways of experiencing the world out there that you could never imagine. Some better, some worse, but all different and worth the ride. Spend time in another culture and you will be changed. Ideas will expand and your realm of what’s possible will grow. All of this helps us better find our path.

Life does not have to be lived the way it was in the past. Most people do because that’s what’s easy. But what’s fun? What fires you up? Let those who are different from you be your inspiration.

I know I will find that along The Dalmatian Coast next week. And believe me, I will have my notebook close in hand and be ready to report back what I’m sure will be an entirely new and invigorating perspective on what I thought I already had figured out.

Safe travels,

Scott

“And the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.”

–T.S. Eliot

While I’m traveling:

Since I will be out experiencing the wonders of a new land, I will be doing a lot of things, but one of those will not be spending time online. However, in my absence I wanted to provide some resources to keep you busy learning and acting. While I’m on my journey, I hope you’ll take one of your own. Below are a few of my favorite paths with some of my best articles and books to get you going:

Take an Awesome Adventure

• The 4-Hour Work Week
• Vagabonding: The Art of Long-Term World Travel
• The Alchemist
• Walden

Get Calm and Remove Some Stress

Outsource Your Life and Get Massively Productive

• 12 Tips for Outsourcing Your Business to the Next Level in Today’s Economy
• 7 Steps to Finishing a Non-Fiction Book in Half the Time While Retaining Twice as Much
• Living the 80/20 Life: 5 Ways to Achieve More with Less
• Quadruple Your Productivity and Enjoy a Little Life: 8 Steps to Getting Things Done

Get Ridiculously Healthy

• How to live to 100: Lessons from the Blue Zones
• A Simple Guide How to Eat Food, Not Too Much, Mostly Plants
• Michael Pollan’s Top 14 Food Rules to Healthy Eating
• Eat Simply and Reclaim Your Energy

Get Super Motivated

• Be Your Own Best Competition: A Guide to Victory
• Make ‘No’ Your Best Motivator
• The Most Dangerous Word in The World
• 13 Life Lessons I Learned from Warren Buffett

Find What You’re Meant to Do on this Earth

• The Beginner’s Guide To Being Congruent
• Finding Short Time Fulfilment Whilst Keeping The Long Term Vision
• Strengths Finder 2.0
• The Power of Purpose
• Awaken the Giant Within
• What Color is Your Parachute
• What Color is Your Parachute Workbook

Enjoy the adventure and I’ll see you in a few weeks!

What adventures have changed your life and how? Which do you recommend? Share with us in the comments.

If you liked this article, please Tweet about it or tell your friends on Facebook using the links below. I’d appreciate it.

Photo 1 courtesy of ronnie44052

Photo 1 courtesy of pasotraspaso

Click here to Download your FREE eBook "The Best of Reading For Your Success"

“Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become.”

-Mahatma Gandhi

Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Average Read Time: 5 minutes

I’ve always believed that if you want to do something, you have to act like you deserve it. Show the world that you are ready.

We hear this all the time when people talk about dressing for the job you want, not for the one you already have.

The clothes you wear are obviously only the beginning (and can surely make a big difference). But even more importantly is how we dress our minds- the attitude and beliefs we must adopt if we are looking to do something on an entirely new level.

Act like the person you want to be, represent them in your mind and actions, and soon that’s who you’ll become.

The same goes for your business and relationships.

That time has come for Reading For Your Success.

Dressing RFYS for Success

We must modify our appearance and expectations if we plan to think, act and be perceived on a higher level. It is time for Reading For Your Success to dress more for the role I want it to serve in your lives as readers and contributors going forward.

So in the next week or so you are going to notice a pretty big shift in the appearance and functionality of the site. As I’ve dedicated more focus to RFYS, and written more articles for other productivity and personal development sites (such as ThinkSimpleNow, MakeItHappen, WriteToDone, GoodLifeZen and Elance), my following has increased faster than I first could have hoped. A few readers have turned into hundreds, rapidly approaching a thousand. It’s been awesome. And thanks to you I truly believe this is only the beginning. The change is an important step forward.

The Vision for RFYS: Help You Discover Your Own Path to Success

When I first started RFYS, it was my way of sharing with the world, the books that I’d found to be most useful for finding and achieving one’s own success. For years it was solely a place for book reviews and summaries. But as I’ve learned more about the space and how I’d like to make my mark and help people, the focus has expanded and refocused at the same time.

RFYS has now become my vehicle for sharing and teaching the lessons I learn from my reading, doing, exploring, traveling, limit testing and life experimenting. To give you a better chance at understanding yourself and what you are most meant to do on this earth. To allow you to live life on your terms.

All of us are here for a reason. We’re all unique and can add value to society it our own ways. We are the only ones who can be the judge of that. How we spend our time or how we define success is not something society should tell us (they don’t have a clue anyway) and it’s not something we should aimlessly go about. There is nothing more important than intentionally discovering your own success and your unique purpose. And all this learning leads up to…

Discovering Your Own Path To Personal Freedom.

For now this is the tagline for the new site design. There will be plenty of testing as to the best fit and I hope to get lots of feedback from you all. The focus is on finding our own path and taking that road less traveled, which will surely make all the difference (it certainly has for me).

Here are some other tag line ideas. Which resonates most with you?

-Discovering life on your terms

-Discovering your own path to success

-Discovering your path, your terms, your success

-Discovering success on your terms

Purpose and freedom are something we all desire, yet few of us take the time to collect the tools for the journey, let alone learn how to use them. RFYS is my best shot at providing this guidance.

Some Ways I Hope You’ll Benefit:

• Get motivated to better realize your goals and dreams
• Find your unique strengths and purpose
• Leverage your time to spend it doing things you love
• Take action on new ideas to better your life experience
• Lead healthier and richer relationships
• Become a valuable addition to society and leave the world a little better than you found it

And this is just the beginning. In the future, I plan to use RFYS as a venue for offering all kinds of other tools to help you along the way.

How I Plan to Contribute Down the Road:

• Writing more inspiring, take-action, articles and book summaries
• Offering custom book suggestions relating to a reader’s goals
• Writing a number of eBooks on the most powerful life-enhancing principles I’ve learned
• Writing a physical book to further spread specific knowledge and experience
• Offering one-on-one and group coaching for those seeking guidance with specific goals along the journey
• Speaking to groups of motivated people on how to live life on your terms

While you can still find plenty of book summaries, it is now a place dedicated to finding your own path to success by learning and taking action through articles, summaries, courses, coaching and whatever else I come across. I want you to find success on your terms and this is my guide.

Why Make a Change?

The previous design of my site was put together on a very old Word Press Theme that provides little leverage with the new tools available (and Google’s little search robots don’t like archaic technology so much either). As a result, the site is a bit cluttered and lacking some focus.

I have wanted to make a change for a while but had only recently refocused the positioning and found a super talented group to help with the transition at the A-List Blogging Bootcamps. The team there and The A List Blogging Club have been an amazing resource for ideas, inspiration and connections over the past months and I can only imagine where it will take us going forward.

Improvements to Expect:

• New header design: more focused on taking the road less traveled to find your unique success
• Less clutter: more focused on the reader’s experience as opposed to other bells and whistles
• Color scheme: I found something that’s a bit simpler and easier on the eyes
• Usability: I hope this new format will make it more inviting to read, learn and act
• Socializing: better ways to interact and share your stories through comments and social tools

Please Share Your Feedback

The design process can be a challenge as things never turn out as you first plan, but often much better once you get used to them. I hope the change doesn’t have any negative effects on you all. My only end goal is for the readers’ experience to be enhanced as a result. That’s why I do all this.

I cherish my readers and the interactions and comments I get on my work. So please share your thoughts. Be honest. If you don’t want to leave it in the comments then email me. I take your thoughts very seriously so I hope you’ll chime in. It would be a huge help for all of us.

Deserve Your Future

If you want to better live your purpose further down the road, you must dress your mind and body so that you deserve your desires.

Let this be a step in that direction for Reading For Your Success. Thanks for joining me on the journey. I can’t begin to express my gratitude for all of your support. There are good things to come.

“There is nothing wrong with change, if it is in the right direction.”

-Winston Churchill

What else would you like to see on the site? What would be more helpful? Which tag line do your prefer? What do you think of the new design (it should be up a few days after this post)? Please share in the comments or via email. It’s greatly appreciated.

If you liked this article, please Tweet about it or tell your friends on Facebook using the links below. I’d appreciate it.

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Photo 2 courtesy of papalars

Click here to Download your FREE eBook "The Best of Reading For Your Success"

“As you grow older, you’ll find the only things you regret are the things you didn’t do.”

-Zachary Scott

Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Average Read Time: 3.5 minutes

Have you ever experienced that burning feeling of regret? When you know you did something that crossed the line?

I know I have.

It only took once or twice to realize how much the feeling tore me up inside.

And now I do absolutely everything I can to avoid actions that might lead to regrets later. But actions are not the only thing that cause regrets.

Inactions can be just as big of a contributor. And they can be a bit sneaky since they don’t involve actually doing anything.

There are two types of things one can regret:

1. Things that we do or don’t do. These are the things we control. When we choose the wrong action or inaction and it results in something we wish never happened. Say we tell a lie, intentionally hurt someone’s feelings or cut an immoral corner.

2. Things that happen to us. These are things we can’t control. Say we are rejected from our number one choice for college or grad school. Or maybe our car gets stolen or we aren’t chosen for that dream job we interviewed for.

While it’s possible to feel regret from either of these, the second type can be solved by realizing that everything happens for a reason. As long as you did your best (and this is an important if, which I’ll get to below) then that’s all you can ask for. If seemly unfavorable things still happen to us, that’s life. Our only option is to grow and move on.

I’m sure looking back you can remember plenty of times where things seemed like they couldn’t have gone worse at the time, but today you wouldn’t change a thing given the opportunity or experience you had as a result. Years ago I was crushed when I didn’t get into the university of my choice, but if I had, I would have never met the amazing woman I’m going to marry next week!

There is nothing we can do about things happening to us other than find the lesson and embrace it.

It reminds me of Warren Buffett’s thoughts regarding investments:

“What you really want to do in investments is figure out what’s important and knowable. If it’s unimportant or unknowable you forget about it.”

The corollary to life is to focus on the things we have control over and forget about the rest. It will save you a boatload of stress and dissatisfaction.

Avoiding the regrets we can control

It’s the first type of regret that we have some control over. The things requiring us to do or not do something.

The most sure-fire way to avoid regrets of this nature is to have a crystal clear understanding of your values, as these become the guiding light for your decions. The topic of values is too big to dive into here but I cover them plenty in The Beginner’s Guide to Being Congruent.

For now, I want to talk about something much simpler than values. What if we’re looking for a quick fix for avoiding regrets?

The simple answer:

Give something every last drop of your effort in every way you know how.

There is no worse feeling than the regret of knowing it was in your realm of control and knowlege to have avoided it. Yet it happens all the time. People end up having another drink or don’t lose that weight. Maybe they don’t make enough sales calls or pass up on the chance to fully prepare for a meeting.There are all kinds of things that cause us failure every day that are inside our control.

I am constantly revisiting this in my investment business. You hear about entrepreneurs all the time who shut the doors because they couldn’t raise enough money for their idea or get enough clients.

If this ever happens to me, it will be because there was not another rock left to turn over. And if that’s not the case then I didn’t want it badly enough.

While I do not have control over what the stock market will do tomorrow or next week, I do have control over the businesses I buy and how many meetings I set up or phone calls I make. A failure due to a bad market is something I could stomach whereas a failure due to too few prospect and client meetings is unacceptable. So I commit myself to focusing on what I can control, making regrets impossible.

It would crush me to look back on a failure and be able to say that I could have done better, I could have worker harder, had more meetings, made more presentations or treated my relationships as more of a priority.

If you fail after giving life every ounce you have then you have succeeded in the knowlege and experience gained. If you fail having known you had more to offer, regret will always linger.

How to Avoid Regrets of Inaction:

1. Know what is controllable and uncontrollable. If you need help, ask a leader in your space.

2. Know your priorities. Don’t expect to be able to give 110% if there are too many things that are more important.

3. Get an objective opinion. This could be a coach, mentor or friend. Anyone who will objectively look at what you’re doing and tell it to you like it is. Whereas we tend to rationalize inaction with ourselves, an outside perspective will not. Find someone who will tell you if you’re being lazy.

4. Find a compelling reason. You must have a tough-as-nails-reason to get yourself to give it all you have. Will you starve, be ridiculed or lose your husband or wife? Find one that motivates you. I covered this more thoroughly in The Most Dangerous Word In the World.

Take a Regret Avoidance Inventory right now and ask yourself the following:

How are you doing with your various goals?
Is it in your control to do better?
If so, why have you not?
Who or what could help?
Do you have a compelling enough reason to make it happen?

The regrets that hurt the most are the ones we know we could have avoided.

We all know when we could be performing at a higher level. Be honest with yourself and do something about it.

Make the decision today. Vow to never again have a regret of inaction. Only commit to goals you are willing to give every ounce of your heart and soul. If they don’t pass that test, they aren’t important.

Once you make this commitment, you will not only abandon regret, but you’ll surely experience mountains more success.

“When one door closes another door opens, but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.”

-Alexander Graham Bell

What has been your biggest avoidable regret? What did you learn? How’d you fair on the Regret Avoidance Inventory? Share with us in the comments.

If you liked this article, please Tweet about it or tell your friends on Facebook using the links below. I’d appreciate it.

Other Books and Resources To Help You Along the Way:

The Most Dangerous Word In the World

The Beginner’s Guide to Being Congruent

7 Habits of Highly Effective People

The 8th Habit

Photo 1 courtesy of erin MC Hammer
Photo 2 courtesy of DanielKHC

Click here to Download your FREE eBook "The Best of Reading For Your Success"

“Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.”

-Abraham Lincoln

Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Average Read Time: 4 minutes

Words are incredibly powerful. There are some that empower us to do our very best and others that can leave us feeling helpless.

Through my own and others’ experiences I have found one to be more dangerous than any other. On that when used once can give you relief, but when used routinely can leave you with the deepest feeling of despair.

This most dangerous word is: Later.

The scary thing is that it seems so harmless at first. There are all kinds of justifications to put things off until tomorrow. A lot of them can feel pretty valid. And even worse, we seem to use this word most for the things that are of greatest importance to us.

I’m talking about the big goals and life changes we’ve had on our mind for years. We know they are not going to be easy, but we also know the payout could be amazing. Yet despite how much they mean to us, we put them off another day. But tomorrow quickly becomes next month or next year and before you know it your Later has become Never.

Most things we put off to later are because the thought of starting them now is intimidating and uncomfortable. But just about everything outside our comfort zone is good for us, so get used to it. If it feels uncomfortable then it’s likely a sign that it’s the right thing.

Later comes in all forms:

I’ll get to it tomorrow (or next year).

I need to be a little older.

Now’s not quite the right time for that idea.

I’ll do it as soon as my family grows up.

Once I graduate I’ll be ready.

When the new year comes, I’ll begin getting healthy again.

I’ll have all day this Saturday, so that’s when I’ll start.

All I need is another few years of experience.

The list goes on as long as your imagination permits…

Most rationalizations as to why you should put your important things off to another day are nothing more than excuses – and expensive ones at that. If we want to experience our most cherished dreams, we must leave Later in the past. The timing will never be perfect.

4 Steps to turn Later into Now

1. We need leverage.

While financial leverage can be dangerous, emotional leverage can be the most powerful tool in personal change. We need a reason to do things. Without a compelling reason, nothing will get done. The right reason provides the leverage to do massive things even with little resources.

Leverage can come from one of two places. You can focus on the wonderful things you’ll experience if you complete your goal (i.e. happiness, personal freedom, finding the love of your life). Or you can focus on the awful things that might happen if you don’t (i.e. loneliness, a heart attack, or the death of a loved one). Positive or negative, discover what will make it an absolute must to accomplish your goal.

I heard a story of a man who tried to quit smoking for years. His friends tried to help. His wife begged. But nothing worked. Then one day his 6-year old daughter came into his office, looked up at him with a scared look on her face and said “daddy I don’t want you to die”. He never smoked another cigarette. That’s leverage. What’s yours? It could be fitting into your wedding dress or being sure you’re alive to teach your grandson math. It’s your call. Just be sure there is major emotion behind it.

2. Do the big things first.

Start the day with your most important tasks. Know what things are going into it. If it’s making a sales call then pick the phone up before you open your computer. If it’s running five miles, then know that if you don’t do it at 6am, it isn’t going to happen. It’s so easy to start the day by opening your computer and checking email and surfing around for a few hours. Great. Are you any closer to something meaningful once you’re done? Likely not.

I didn’t dig into my email until 4pm today and I got mountains done. Knocking your big things out first will feel amazing and will get you on a roll for the rest of the day. Anything you do now is ensuring that it won’t be put off until never.

3. Chunk it down.

Thinking of a long-term goal as a single item to accomplish can be massively overwhelming. But every goal has all kinds of 5-minute or one-hour tasks leading up to it. Take for example writing a book. If you haven’t yet written a word and you look at your goal one day that says “write a book”, the intimidation is going to make it almost impossible to begin. But what if you had, “write the first page” or “write a few chapter titles” as one of your tasks? That can be done in one sitting. All of a sudden you’re a step closer and you’ve got momentum.

“Most people overestimate what they can accomplish in a year, and drastically underestimate what they can achieve in a decade!”

-Tony Robbins

4. Clear the distractions.

It is so much easier to put big ideas off if you have little meaningless things to fill up the time. Email, TV, video games, surfing the web. We all have our distractions and most of us know when we’re wasting time when we should be focusing on the important. Be honest with yourself. Listen to how you feel. Are you proud to be watching an hour go by as you mindlessly surf the web? Often these tasks aren’t even necessary, and they certainly shouldn’t be your priority.

As Tim Ferriss says: Put a sticky note on your desk, right in front of you, that says “Am I inventing things to avoid the important.”

There is only Now

Have you ever been in your future? I thought not. Nothing actually happens later. When it comes down to it, it’s all about today. That’s what changes tomorrow.

We all have dreams we want to make a reality. And as sure as we’ll continue to dream, there will always be reasons to push them to Later. Don’t fall for it. Don’t wait. Life is too short.

It’s so easy to put things off until tomorrow. Later will not be a better time. At some point, if Later doesn’t become Now, it becomes Never. The longer you wait, the closer never becomes.

It takes your whole life to never do something. But it takes an instant to decide to do it today. Why not get started? All it takes is a good enough reason. Now is where it all happens anyway. Later is nothing more than an excuse for inaction. There is always something you can do today to get you closer to your dreams tomorrow.

When is now a good time to begin?

“Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.”

-Barak Obama

What important things have you been putting off? What compelling reasons can you find to turn Later into Today? Share in the comments section below.

If you liked this article, please Tweet about it or tell your friends on Facebook using the links below. I’d appreciate it.

Other Articles and Books to Help You Along the Way:

The Power fo Now

Unlimited Power

The Art of Time

Quadruple Your Productivity and Enjoy a Little Life

Photo courtesy of lulieboo

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“Be the change you want to see in the world.”

-Mahatma Gandhi

Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Average Read Time: 6 minutes

Editor’s Note: This is a book review for Arvind Devalia’s book Get the Life You Love and Live It

We all have dreams. Maybe get that perfect job. Start that business. Meet the right person. Lose 20 pounds. Find your purpose.

Whatever your own vision of success is, the only thing that usually stands between your dreams and reality is action. It starts with that first single step to climb a mountain.

Why then is it so hard to begin?

We get so used to just one way of doing things that getting ourselves to take that first key step requires some massive effort. It isn’t enough to know the end result. We need to fill in the steps in between. Just as it’s difficult to drive somewhere without directions, it’s even more important that you have a map to your success.

Arvind Devalia provides just that in his book “Get the Life You Love“.

I came across Arvind and his book after stumbling on his blog, Make It Happen, where he offers his thoughts on getting the things out of life we most desire.

Arvind’s blog is also his platform for offering in-person and virtual coaching session on the same topic. Being out of London, his writing has a very worldly perspective, making it all the more applicable (and entertaining).

Get the Life You Love is all about action, which I love. It’s divided up into 25 sections that cover life’s areas from health to life-values to balanced living and back again. Each short section starts with a few pages of inspirational words followed by two pages of hands-on activities. You get to fill in the blanks for your daily actions and answer some seriously thought-provoking questions. It’s not just a book but a do-it-yourself workbook. The activities require real thought and effort and his opening words to each section get you in the perfect state to start producing answers.

No matter your goals or dreams, there’s something here for everyone.

Not all of us need or want to change the same things in our lives, nor do any of us likely need to change everything. So feel free to mix and match different sections of the book depending on your life situation. Maybe for now you just want to start with getting massively healthy and fit. Then go right to Step 18. Or if you are a little lost when it comes to your life purpose, flip to that section for questions and activities that will cause you to dig deep.

Even if you do plan to only focus on one area, I would still read the book cover to cover first. Arvind’s concise writing means it will likely only take you an hour or two to do so (I breezed through it on a mini-retreat in Tahoe a few weeks back). It’s the exercises where the real meat and improvement lie. The stuff is very simply written and engaging, and you will likely find more areas you’d like to spend time on than you initially thought.

And thankfully, none of these steps are overwhelming or difficult, as some goals can be. He’s broken them down into simple, practical things that can make all the difference. The smallest task can get you the momentum you need.

Some of the most powerful sections for me were:

Give and receive. Arvind is a living example of giving and contribution through his charity, coaching and personal endeavors. As he says, stop worrying about how to get to the top. Find ways to uniquely help those around you. The “contribution high” you’ll get will beat fleeting feelings of personal accomplishment. Sooner rather than later you are likely to be paid back many fold.

Keep your cool. If it won’t matter in five years from now then why waste your emotions on it? Rarely is anything really worth getting worked up about. Have fun with the things that don’t go quite right. There’s probably a reason anyway.

Clear the clutter. So simple. Getting rid of all the old stuff around your house is incredibly liberating. Do the same with the heavier things in your life that clutter your mind and your days. Anything that doesn’t serve your purpose or those around you should be ruthlessly cut. Learn to say no to things. Create a clean work space mentally and physically.

Find the work you love. Life is too short to not understand your purpose and do what you love. Contrary to popular belief, it is possible. I know plenty of people making a living doing exactly what they want. Arvind is one of them. It just takes some work. Maybe a lot of work. But isn’t that extra effort worth it to discover what you are supposed to do with your life? He’ll help you identify your natural strengths and purpose and help get you living them.

Increase your energy. Unbelievable energy exists in our bodies, we just have to tap into it. Have you ever noticed at times how you can barely keep your eyes open, and all of a sudden someone walks into the room, a song comes on or an idea pops into your head that makes you perk straight up? Keep track of the things that light a fire in your belly. Do the same for those that kill your energy. Decide on what you would rather spend your time. The same goes for the people around you. And of course how you treat your body. Your level of physical activity and what you put in your mouth have massive effects on your energy. Learn how to get the most from your body.

Strive for excellence. We have two options going through life. Do the minimum to get by or be your absolute best at whatever it is. Too many choose the former. The fact that I can always choose to give something my full energy and excellence is what gets me leaping out of bed to go after things. Personal excellence is a choice. People will notice.

Enjoy the single life. Like I said, Arvind hits every area. This obviously doesn’t apply to everyone (especially a guy like me who’s getting married in 3 weeks) but to the people it does, there are few things more important. When you’re too intensely focused on the lookout for someone special, it takes your focus away from simply enjoying what you already have. And enjoyment can be the best attraction factor of all.

Arvind doesn’t miss a thing as he steps us through our biggest areas of attention and helps us create a path towards improvement, whatever that might mean to you. His experiences with his clients and himself provide more than enough real-world insights to make this reality. When it feels real, it feels possible. When it feels possible, we’re likely to do something about it.

Read this in a day or casually make you’re way through it over the next few weeks and months. Choose a new section every couple weeks and make it your focus to give thoughtful attention to the activities.

Reading is where learning starts, but action is where the magic happens.

Dreams don’t happen all at once but through countless tiny steps forward. Get the Life You Love provides the framework. Weave your life through it and you will experience the difference.

As opposed to most prescriptive self improvement books, the action and interaction required makes this map unique to each of us.

You’ll actually learn about yourself.

All of us will have different paths towards our own successes. No matter the route, a map will make all the difference. Something that guides you to be the person you know you can be–to getting the life you love. If you’re at a loss for how to take that first step, as I know so many of us are, this is just the place to start.

“Create a trail of happiness behind you, as you go forward in your life.”

- Arvind Devalia

What steps have you taken to make positive life changes? What resources have been most empowering? Share with us in the comments below.

If you liked this article, please Tweet about it or tell your friends on Facebook using the links below. I’d appreciate it.

Buy Get the Life You Love at Amazon

Other Articles and Resources to Help You Along the Way:

Get The Life You Love Website

Arvind’s Blog: Make It Happen

The Beginner’s Guide to Being Congruent

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“So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.”

-Christopher Reeve

Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Average Reading Time: 5.5 minutes

Three weeks ago I thought that running a barefoot 50k Ultra Marathon at 7500 ft. of elevation would be impossible. So did a few others.

Three days ago I found out it wasn’t.

In just a sliver under 8 hours and 24 minutes, after over 31 miles, I wobbled across the finish line of the Tahoe Rim Trail, barefoot-style (In my Vibram’s).

Up until Saturday I’d never run over 15 miles, let alone a marathon, especially at elevation.

I heard all kinds of objections (both from myself and others). But you haven’t even run a marathon. Those barefoot things you call shoes will never give you the support you need. That elevation gain is too much for a first long run. And on it went.

So why did I decide to give it a shot? Because it seemed impossible.

I believed a lot of it for a while and then I just decided what do I have to lose? The worst case is I can’t finish. Who cares? It was impossible anyway, right?

Besides, I had recently read Born to Run and I was fired up about the possibility of the human body. I was dying to test out if I too was ‘Born to Run’. This event was the perfect chance. And I love a good challenge.

For those of you who haven’t read Born to Run, it will dramatically change the way you look at the human body and it’s possibilities. The author tracks an Indian tribe, the Tarahumara, whose members of all ages are able to run hundreds of miles at a time with nothing but thin sandals on their feet. A must read for the physically active. The book discovers:

How and why we as humans are meant to run.

Why barefoot is the least injury-prone way to do it (I’ve been running in Vibram barefoot running shoes ever since).

That pure love for running is what makes extraordinary distance possible.

The unbelievable limits of the mind and body that most of us never come close to reaching.

When was the last time you attempted the impossible?

Over the past 10 years or so I have made it a habit to attempt what others and/or myself have considered impossible. It makes for the best challenge in the world and the results are magical no matter what happens. Let me explain.

I’ve seen the impossible come true way too many times to not try otherwise. People have a tendency to use this word all too often. So often that it gives the world an excuse not to live up to our full potential. Just because someone says you can’t do something doesn’t mean you can’t. It just means someone thinks you can’t. Imagine if Bill Gates, Steve Jobs or Sergey Brin listened to the skeptics in their lives.

When we obey the impossible the result is mediocrity.

Impossible triggers many of us to stop short of what we’re capable of. It keeps us from truly testing the edge. And without knowing our limits, how will we ever experience our dreams?

The Benefits of Attempting the Impossible:

1. There are no expectations. So often we attempt things where there are standards by which we are quickly judged. And even if no one else is paying attention, we are our own worst critics. So much of unhappiness and disappointment comes from mismanaged expectations. The impossible has the lowest expectations of all. If you fail, who cares? It was impossible to begin with. Try being underpreapared sometime. It’s liberating.

2. There’s less competition. The majority of people are trained to listen to and shut down at the sight the impossible things in life. This leaves the field wide open for you. Oddly it is the most audacious goals that have the least competition. It’s the mediocre ones that everyone is clamoring over. If you want to leave your competition in the dust, simply attempt something they’d never dream of trying.

3. Growth is guaranteed. The point of attempting the impossible is not to always find victory. The person who consistently tests the impossible will experience more failure that the one who always settles for the average. But the former will also experience many more outrageous accomplishments. There is no failure as long as you’re learning. With every expereince comes a lesson. Big lessons come from testing the impossible. Either way you will be a new person for having tried.

4. You might just get it. It’s true that not everything is possible. But how can you ever know if you don’t try? One thing is for sure: Your chances of doing it are 0% if you never try. Give it a crack and you just might surprise yourself and succeed. The victory will expand your realm of what’s possible. The ripple effect throughout your life will be amazing. If you accomplish enough impossible things, you’ll be unstoppable.

What’s the worst case scenario?

Fear is usually the number one reason for not doing something. But ask yourself what’s so scary. What’s the worst that can happen? For me it was not finishing. Big deal. I was underpreapred anyway.

You’ll often find your worse case to be right where you were before you ever tried. This goes for starting a business, leaving your job, asking someone out or just about anything else. So you quit your job to start a business. If it fails then you’ll probably end up at a similar job as you were before. If your current situation is your worst case, what could you possibly have to lose?

Reframe the impossible.

The thought of an Ultra Marathon at elevation scared me at first. So instead I looked at it as an all day hike. We are free to define things however we choose. If someone interesting seems like they’d never say yes to a date, then think of it as making a new friend. If starting a business is too scary, then consider it a hobby. Reframe the impossible until it seems possible.

Everything was impossible until someone decided not to listen.

The world’s inventions have always come from someone who decided to attempt the impossible, and succeeded. Everything was impossible, even ridiculous, until someone invented it.

It was crazy to think the flip of a switch could light up a whole house back when everyone was carrying around candles. Good thing Thomas Edison didn’t think so.

The human body was scientifically incapable of running a four minute mile, right up until Roger Banister went out and did it. Then what happened? 16 people did the same the following 3 years.

But impossible does not have to mean what the world thinks can’t be done. It may be something you’ve felt was personally impossible (like my run) or the things people tell you can’t be done given your life situation. You’re too young, too old, too sick, undereducated or underprepared. Remember, usually the people who tell you this are the ones who never made the attempt.

“Impossible is a word only to be found in the dictionary of fools.”

- Napoleon

Our lives are defined by the impossible.

My life would be worlds different if I’d listened to all the people who told me what I couldn’t or shouldn’t do. So many magnificent experiences with my businesses, relationships and body would have never existed. Think back on your life and I imagine you’d agree.

It’s easy to go through life finding excuses for not doing things. You will produce plenty on your own and the world will provide mountains more. But if you wait to be perfectly prepared to attempt your dreams, you’ll never try anything. The timing is never right. You’ll never have enough experience. You can always prepare a bit more.

Get over it.

Hearing something couldn’t be done has always been my biggest motivator. Why not make it yours? I’d much rather find out for myself than be guided by someone else who might not have even had the courage to try.

The limits of possibility are where all the growth happens. Be it in the world or in your own mind. And a mind without limits is tough to stop. Let it loose!

Be a fighter of the status quo. Just because it hasn’t been done, does not mean it can’t or that it shouldn’t.

Go out and try something the world believes is impossible. Who knows, you might just get it.

“I tell people I’m too stupid to know what’s impossible. I have ridiculously large dreams, and half the time they come true.”

- Debi Thomas

What have you accomplished that the world told you was impossible? How is your life different as a result? Please share in the comments section below.

If you liked this article, please Tweet about it or tell your friends on Facebook using the links below. I’d appreciate it.

Other Books and Resources to Help You Along the Way:

As a Man Thinketh

Unlimited Power

Vibram Five Finger barefoot running shoes

Pictures from my Ultra Marathon: Are We Born to Run?

Click here to Download your FREE eBook "The Best of Reading For Your Success"

“You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.”

-Jack London

Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Average Reading Time: 5 minutes

As we go through life, it’s easy to get caught up in the status quo. You start to believe that average is acceptable and that since others are settling, then it’s ok to do the same. As soon as you notice this start to happen, something must be done to snap out of it!

I’ve found a few blogs that do this especially well. They guide me to live a more purposeful life while encouraging me to do it on my terms. There is no substitute for people who have done it. Below are my top 10 blogs both as personal development resources and thought changers.

They make us question our actions. Are they really most inline with who we are? If I look back on my life in 50 years will I be proud of how I’m directing my energy and unique strengths? These blogs will make you think. A lot of these people are hardly 30 years old and some are barely 20.

They’re living proof that it’s possible to do what you love and to share it with others.

Top 10 Blogs to Inspire Action

1. Think Simple Now. Tina Su has created a masterpiece and for the past couple years it’s been her full time gig. She has been one of my main models for success. Her articles cover everything from speed reading to meditation to simple living and creativity. Every post is super high quality with ways to make a change. Real life issues with simple solutions.

One of my all time favorite posts: How to Keep a Relationship (especially important for a guy getting married in five weeks).

2. Zen Habits. This is one of my foundation sites. Leo Babauta is all about simplicity, productivity and simply enjoying life. His posts are so easy to apply and see immediate benefit. He just made the number one slot for Time Magazine Best Blogs of 2010. In four years he’s grown to over 200,000 subscribers from a total standing start. He also provides awesome resources through the A-List Blogger Club for those looking to make their website, writing and blog a career. The stuff works. What a generous person.

Start Here: The Beginner’s Guide to Zen Habits.

3. The Blog of Tim Ferriss: Experiments in Lifestyle Design. Tim’s book, The 4-Hour Work Week has had a more profound effect on my life and belief of what’s possible than any other single resource. Of the past 9 people I’ve given the book to, 7 have quit their job within months, to go on to do things more in line with who they are. His blog is an extension to his book including all kinds of life hacking and lifestyle designs experiments. Tim is a brilliant guy and has done wonders for getting us to turn our thinking on its head and be better because of it.

Here’s a fun post of his to get you started: How to Be Jason Bourne.

4. Illuminated Mind: Follow Your Dreams. Jonathan Mead will also turn your thinking upside down, in a good way. He’s only in his mid 20′s and has made this site his career. He writes killer articles about finding and living your passion and doing your best to add value to the world. I read his 0-Hour Work Week eBook last weekend, after which I could hardly sleep. The simple premise: If you do what you truly love and are meant to do, then it’s no longer work. It all becomes enjoyment. Very contrarian thinker.

Here’s a short post to get the gears cranking: The Two Most Dangerous Words.

5. The Art of Non Conformity. Chirs Guillebeau, not unlike Tim or Jonathan, is all about challenging authority and seeing the world. His blog documents his goal to see all 192 countries (At about 30 years old, he’s already hit 125) and to share his life lessons throughout the journey. What a way to combine work and passion. I just read his Manifesto, A Brief Guide to World Domination, and it no doubt would have made me quit my job if I hadn’t already. Very life purpose oriented. His view is if you do what you love, you can take over of the world (or do just about anything else on your mind). I think he might be doing both.

Here’s something to make you want to leave the country for a bit: Beginner’s Guide to Travel Hacking.

6. Get More from Life. I cannot believe what Scott Young has accomplished in his 21 years. His blog covers him financially and he hasn’t even finished university. He’s written a few books and his articles make you want to explore the world and refuse to settle. He is on a quest to learn how to get the most from life and so far he’s on an awesome track.

My favorite recent post: Is Being Rich Important to Living the Ideal Life? So right on!

7. Make It Happen. Arvind Devalia is a burst of energy. Each of his articles put us one step closer to living the life we deserve. This is his way of making the world at least a bit better. With it comes practical steps and a ton of exercises to actually get us where we want to be. His eBook, Get the Life You Love, does a stellar job of walking you through 25 areas of your life with exercises and actions to make it happen. Arvind is incredibly generous and his experience as a coach and writer really shine through. I am a better writer and contributor because of it.

Arvind’s most recent post Why You Are Enough is amazing.

8. Good Life Zen. Mary Jaksch runs this site as well as WriteToDone and A-List Blogger Club with Leo from Zen Habits. I love this for simple refreshers regarding meditation, clarity and just being a little bit better at things. She’s an authorized Zen Master and offers a unique experience through her Virtual Zen Retreats. Mary is an inspiration for anyone looking to make a career of blogging and she will enable you to do so in awesome ways. Here genuine generosity and interest in helping people along their paths is something the world could use a little more of.

Here’s a nice post to slow you down: How to Meditate: 10 Important Tips.

9. Live Bold and Bloom. Barrie Davenport is a Career and Life Transition Coach turning pro blogger. It’s been invigorating to see her grow. She covers everything from health and energy to career and purpose. I also love checking out her book recommendations. Her free eBook How to Lead a Meaningful Life is a fun shot in arm for being more purposeful with how you spend your time. No doubt she loves exactly what she’s doing with hers.

This post made me think: How your Language Can Change your Life.

10. The Art of Great Things. Jeffrey Tang is an amazing writer and in his mid 20′s he’s an inspiration to see the following he’s created. He shares his quest for discovering the great things that make our lives rich (and not necessarily just our bank accounts). He’s written some awesome articles for Zen Habits and has made an impressive mark for himself thus far. I can only imagine what’s next.

Great things in this post: The Introvert’s Guide to People.

11. Change Your Thoughts. Change Your Life. Steve Aitchison’s site is full of fresh thoughts and some really powerful free eBooks. As a coach and NLP expert his site is dedicated to changing thoughts, patterns and beliefs that keep us from living the life we deserve. A lot of hands-on tips and processes along with some unique guided meditations. Awesome to see all he’s done.

I loved his recent post/video: The Space Between Something and Nothing.

Ok so maybe that’s 11. It was tough to choose.

These are some of the places I find inspiration. What about you?

It’s crucial to have models and inspiration as we all journey through life. Yours will obviously depend on your own path and what’s most important to you. I have always tried to spend time around people who have made it their life’s work to take the road less traveled and dedicate their lives to doing what they love. It’s not only refreshing but it’s contagious.

These people are a constant source of ideas and they become especially important when my path looks a little too threatening to proceed. They can immediately change my state. They are my inspiration to learn, write and share it with all of you through ReadingForYourSuccess.

Make it a priority to find the things and people who inspire you. Keep their work close by and review it often. These can be books, articles, blogs, videos or anything else that lights a fire in your belly. Not only will they help you better understand what you want, but will give you a much better shot at getting it.

What are your favorite blogs and resources for inspiring action? I’m always on the look out for more. Share them in the comments below.

If you liked this article, please Tweet about it or tell your friends on Facebook using the links below. I’d appreciate it.

Photo courtesy of Abnel Gonzalez

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“Acceptance is such an important commodity, some have called it the first law of personal growth.”

-Peter McWilliams

Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Average Reading Time: 3.5 minutes

When was the last time your were frustrated by someone around you?

Maybe they’re always late, can’t seem to follow through, missed another deadline, or perhaps you just don’t see eye to eye.

It doesn’t make a difference what it is. The possibilities are endless and we all have a long list. By nature we expect life to just be the way we want it to be. When it’s not, we don’t like it.

Many of us choose to carry this frustration around day to day.

We quickly forget that it is indeed a choice to feel this way.

I am no different. I have carried around a list of expectations turned frustrations for years. With all kinds of people in my life, even those closest to me. Often they are little things, and occasionally big ones. It doesn’t matter. Either way, we seem to have a knack for letting the uncontrollable get to us.

But what’s the point?

These are amazing people. There is nothing wrong with them. It’s actually just the opposite. They are simply being who they are. And that’s why I love them.

It is ok that people don’t approach life exactly like you or I do. That’s what makes it fun!

Life is too short to choose frustration over acceptance.

If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten. I have always hoped for these little things to be different and I’ve gotten frustration as a result (And I’m sure others have felt the same of me). I’m tired of getting the same outcome, so I think it’s time to change my approach. Why not just accept?

In dealing with others’ actions, we have 3 options:

1. Cut them out of our life. This may work for some of your fringe relationships but not with the people who make your life what it is. If you have some that should be cut out, then by all means cut away. If you realize this is someone who is just too misaligned with you, then you likely don’t have any room for them. But for all the other people we really care about, this option is pretty unrealistic.

2. Be frustrated. This is what many people choose. We get aggravated every time it happens. We let it affect our days and sometimes even the interactions we have with others. You must ask yourself, how much does this really help me or anyone around me?

3. Accept them for who they are and embrace it. This is where we stand to grow. With a simple choice we can add tremendous value to ourselves as well as the world around us. Think of how much simpler and more enjoyable your life would be if you let these little things roll off your back.

“Acceptance is the true thing everyone longs for. The one thing everyone craves. To walk in a room and to be greeted by everyone with hugs and smiles. And in that passing moment, you truly know you’re loved, needed, and accepted.” –Rena Harmon

The only empowering choice is to accept.

Be honest with yourself. Do you really think that after all these years that person is going to change? Who knows. If it’s important enough to them then maybe, but I certainly wouldn’t bet your happiness on it.

I have a firm belief that we can do whatever we want, as long as what we decide is in line with who we really are. That is our own decision. Working on improving and changing yourself to be a better person is one thing (and something I wholly encourage).

But spending energy on expecting someone around you to change (especially if they have no desire to) is unrealistic. And what’s even more ridiculous is being frustrated when your expectations aren’t met.

Why accept others as they are?

Life is too short for frustration. There are plenty of uncontrollable aggravations in life. Acceptance allows you to control what you can.

You are forced to find the good in others. These people are in your life for a reason. You love and cherish them. It’s easy to forget how amazing they are when you’re bathing in negative feelings. Take time to remember what’s great about them.

It creates realistic expectations of others. Expect they will continue to act as they do. Then you’ll be pleasantly surprised anytime something different happens.

You likely do things that are just as frustrating. As sure as someone does something that bothers you, you do something that bothers them. None of us are perfect. Be accepting of others and they will be accepting of you.

It strengthens your relationships. The pent-up aggression will disappear as you start to focus on the best those around you have to offer. In holding nothing back, you will likely grow closer.

It might even cause a change. Sometimes taking the focus off someone’s less-desirable traits raises their standard of themselves and whatever they previously did may disappear. Do not expect this nor accept others just for the hope of it happening. The only way you and those around you will enjoy acceptance is if it’s genuine. There is no hiding this. Either your heart’s behind your intentions or it’s not. The world will notice.

Acceptance starts with yourself.

As you begin to more consciously accept others, realize that acceptance starts with you. Self-acceptance is often the first step in realizing life needs to be different. If you’re in a sales job but you don’t feel you’re meant to be a salesman, then do something about it. Accept yourself for the wonderful things you are and all the things you aren’t, and take action to spend your time in a way that’s more in line with who you are. The world will be a better place as a result.

Acceptance means settling for the best life has to offer.

It’s easy to think, in a world of “don’t settle for less than you can be”, that deciding to accept life and those around you is settling for less. It could not be further from the truth. Accepting is the first step in empowering yourself and others to live life on a much clearer and extraordinary level.

There is no settling in allowing yourself to unconditionally accept and appreciate the people in your life, including yourself. It’s likely the greatest gift you could give.

It is of course easier said than done. The journey of acceptance is one that, no matter when it’s started, will last the rest of your life. I think it’s time to begin.

We can go through each day choosing one of two things: acceptance or frustration. Given that you have the choice, isn’t it a pretty easy one to make?

“Truly loving another means letting go of all expectations. It means full acceptance, even celebration of another’s personhood.” –Karen Casey

What are some things you could accept of others that would allow both of you to live life on a higher level? Share in the comments section below.

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How often have you stopped to think about how free you are?

In the U.S., today is the day we’ve decided to celebrate our freedom. But with all the BBQ, beer, fireworks and fun, it’s all too easy to forget the importance of such a word.

While today may be a subtle reminder for some of us, we must embrace and cherish our freedom every day. It’s all around us. And it’s so easy to take for granted.

Today and everyday forward, I encourage you to embrace what we have at our fingertips. Make the below a part of your everyday life and allow yourself to live freely.

What makes us, as humans, free?

We are free to spend time with the people we love.

We are free to smile, laugh and play to our hearts content.

We are free to have an idea and create a career out of it.

We are free to read and learn and to use our knowledge to teach and help others.

We are free to be as healthy and treat our bodies with as much respect as we want.

And most importantly, as Viktor Frankl taught us, every person in this world is free to choose their thoughts. We are all free to choose the meaning we give to life’s occurrences. No matter our circumstances, however wonderful or terrible, no one can take our freedom to choose our recations to what life throws our way.

Life will not always go right. In fact at times it may feel like it’s gone terribly wrong. That’s all part of the journey. It is during these crucibles that it is on each of us to choose the meaning that most serves our life situation.

Freedom is an amazingly powerful part of life. Some of us have it all and some of us wish we had more, but we all have the most important freedom of all.

Choose your thoughts wisely. They are the only thing that can’t be taken away.

What do you do to feel free on a daily basis? What empowering meanings do you give to your experiences? Share in the comments section below.

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Man’s Search for Meaning

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